Most big families get to increase in size gradually. Usually in increments of one, sometimes two or three if you account for multiple births. In blended families this isn’t the case. Especially for me, I went from a mum of three to a mum of eight LITERALLY over night.
I get asked all the time, how do you cope? With the washing? or The cooking? Most days I can’t answer you. I don’t know how to. We just do.
The never ending laundry pile
Darcy doesn’t help with the housework, not because he can’t or doesn’t want to. I won’t let him, or is it can’t let him? I’m not a hundred percent sure which one it is?? Insert epic eye roll here ** , YES I’m one of THOSE people.
My eye will physically twitch if I watch him try and fold washing. Believe it or not, I’m working on it and trying to let it go. If you opened any of the kids wardrobes they look like a bomb has exploded. Even though I give them perfectly folded washing it just gets shoved in there anyhow. So what’s the point of my stressing my eye twitch about it? As long as it’s clean and given to the correct person folded, that’s ok? Isn’t it? (Shhhh! Don’t tell anyone, but I totally was deep breathing while I wrote that bit)
I’m not OCD and my house is very rarely on point. Not because I don’t try either, I tidy and clean a lot!! At the end of the day though ten people live here. That’s ten lots of stuff!! We only have a small living and dining area and because of that we have another set of rules.
My horrid kitchen
many rules. I guess another coping mechanisms without even really realising it until now. No food is aloud north past the dining room door, and no toys are aloud south of that same door.
In the five years we have been doing this together, there has been fights, tears and tantrums and that’s just from me. We didn’t know what we were doing, or what to expect we’ve just been winging it. One issue at a time. Sometimes we get it right, sometimes we get it wrong unfortunately there is no handbook.
We also don’t live in the same town as our families, so we don’t have the luxury of a long line of backup people to call on to give us hand. Which makes it extra special when they are here and able to help. I’ve always been pretty independent anyway so even if they were here all the time, I’d like to think we’d still battle out most days on our own.
There is a point to this post though. My blog is my happy place and I show you what I want you to see. This morning for example, you got to see 8 smiling kids ready for back to school. What you didn’t see is master 8 chucking a sook before the picture because he didn’t want to eat all his breakfast. I’m a normal mum, I don’t always have it together and sometimes my kids eat toast for dinner. Menu plan or no menu plan I sometimes get the CBF’s too (if you don’t know what that means inbox me). Don’t compare yourself or your kids to me and mine. Don’t compare yourself to skinny sally with her perfect Prado down the street either. She’s probably a miserable bitch anyway. Your running your own race with your own teammates.
Cheers 🥂
Want I do want though is to support you, share with you what I’ve learnt as a mum of 8, stepmum and mum!! I don’t recall having so many resources 5 years ago to help me. Ask me questions, share your stories. I might learn from you too.
Things aren’t always what they seem. (What’s on the outside the frame of that picture?)
Bye.
Bec
3Plus5 